On the cold and busy Friday night of February 6, 2004, Ken and Maynard encountered a patron with an intense love for a particular song on the jukebox.

I asked a man to leave because he got upset about the jukebox. He got mad at me because Matt skipped a song on the jukebox that the guy had played twice in a row. The guy asked me what happened to his song and when I told him, he said that if I didn’t put it back on he was going to come over the bar and kick my *bleep*. I then told him he would be leaving and asked Ken to escort him out of the bar.

–Maynard, the enemy of old men worldwide

Normally we never, ever skip a song that someone has paid money to hear. However, when they do something that annoys the other patrons, like playing the same song twice in a row, or playing three solid hours of Frank Sinatra, we exercise our jukebox authority for the good of the people. We love Frank, but not that much.

Had the man been a little nicer and not threatened to kick Maynard’s *bleep*, it’s likely that one of the bartenders would have put a credit back on the jukebox for the man to pick a new song.

I wish they would have written down the name of the offending song.